The Burnout Books that Helped me Find My Way
I get asked for reading recommendations ALL THE TIME.
And I totally understand why, because I’ve been there! When I Burned Out, when I first even heard the term Burnout from my doctor, the first thing I did was start looking for books, podcasts and Instagram accounts to understand what it was I was dealing with.
And let me tell you… the world is not exactly awash with Burnout books! There are more now that there were when I started looking, and as the topic is becoming more talked about, I’m noticing the Burnout Buzzword appearing in more and more titles. But, the more popular Burnout becomes as a topic, the more diluted I’ve noticed the market getting, often with books that aren’t actually helpful. The word gets overused, sometimes, and runs the risk of becoming just another way of saying ‘tired’ or ‘stressed’. Burnout is so much more than that! You can’t sleep it off in a weekend, or ‘get over it’ by drinking smoothies and starting your day with toxic positivity affirmations. Beating Burnout is HARD WORK, but it’s worth it.
These are the books that make up my own Burnout Busting arsenal (so far). They aren’t all ‘self-help’ books, and they don’t all do the same job, but they have all contributed to a part of my Journey so I figure that they might help you on yours as well.
Onward to the list!
(Please note this page includes affiliate links, and should you purchase any of these books by clicking on links from this article, I may receive a measly amount of pennies from Jeff Bezos.)
The Burnout Solution, by Siobhan Murray.
I. LOVE. THIS. BOOK.
This is the book that started it all for me. It’s the only one that came up when I started searching for Burnout books and I’m so glad it did, because it gave me the foundation I needed to get on my road to recovery. I related a lot to so much of Siobhan’s stories; she had come from the Music Industry and I from the Live Entertainment Industry, and so while our paths have been very different, there was an area of overlap that gave me solace when I was right back at the beginning, so often feeling like the people I was talking to didn’t quite understand the pressure of the world I’d come from.
The Burnout Solution essentially gave me a framework for the beginnings of my Burnout Recovery, and I refer back to it often. It aligned perfectly with the work I was doing with my therapist, my doctor, and my coach in the first twelve weeks of coming back to life after Burnout.
The Bouncebackability Factor, by Cait Donovan.
Cait hosts the awesome Burnout podcast; Fried. Again, this was one of the first sources I found when I began facing the reality of my Burnout. Once of the episodes I returned to again and again back at the beginning was with Stacie Mitchell, a Burnout Coach at that time - and now a Business Coach for Coaches. Stacie talked about High Functioning Anxiety and her conversation with Cait struck so many chords for me, and after that episode I followed both of them - and have been coached by the both since too!
About six months into my own Burnout Recovery, Cait published the Bouncebackability Factor. I knew it was coming, I’d been following every mention of it on the podcast, and I was not disappointed. This book came along at the perfect point for me because not only is it packed with brilliant advice for beating Burnout, from a unique perspective that I could relate to a lot (Cait is a practicing Acupuncturist and by that time I’d started diving deep into Eastern Medicine, inspired by my study of Yin Yoga), but it also spoke to the Entrepreneur, as opposed to the Employee. So much Burnout advice is framed within a work environment, but precious little is out there to help the people who work for themselves. The Bouncebackability Factor has been a brilliant resource as I’ve journeyed into self-employed life!
Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway, by Susan Jeffers.
This is an absolute classic. If you haven’t already read it, you’ve probably heard of it. My gorgeous friend lent a copy of this book to me when I burned out, as it had helped her a lot on her own journey. At the time when she gave it to me, I was a bit dismissive. I read the back and actually said; ‘I just don’t think fear is my problem.’ I didn’t think it was! I look at my life and I’ve done so much, so many incredibly ballsy things, and I’ve done it all on my own. Fear? I didn’t even know her.
Cut to a couple of weeks later, in my therapist’s office, and I’m up to my eyeballs in soggy tissues and pages notes, as we deep dive into my lifetime supply of extreme anxiety and she asks me; ‘Why is it you’re so afraid of everything?’
The person who thought fear wasn’t really her problem, was actually afraid of SO MUCH. Fear has controlled my thoughts, my feelings, my anxiety, my whole life. And when I started to come to terms with that, this book opened my eyes. Fear itself is generally worse than the thing you’re worrying about. Once you’ve done the thing, the fear is gone. Whatever the result, you’ve done it, the fear has stopped. It’s the FEAR that fucks you up. So feel it, but do the thing anyway.
The Year of Living Danishly, by Helen Russell.
In this memoir, Helen Russell, a British writer, relocates to Denmark with her husband, after he gets a job working for Lego. This book isn’t actually about Burnout, but to hear Helen describe her London life, I would beg to differ. Her old life is SO relatable to me, and so as she documents their year in Denmark, I followed with fascination as she learned the lessons I needed to learn myself. At the time, Denmark was officially the happiest country in the world, and so Helen spent a year figuring out why.
The simplicity of life, the value of safety and security, the odd customs and quirks of the country - and of course a deep dive into the value of Hygge and all of those other Scandi Instagram trends that I’d thought I’d understood and acted on by buying nice candles and throws from Oliver Bonas on my way home from work at 10PM at night, it’s all explored so brilliantly through a somewhat sceptical British lens.
Helen discovers the secrets of Denmark’s happiness, and shares them. Some of them you can take or leave - but others are incredibly valuable. This book made me realise that the opposite of Burnout, is Happiness.
Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies, by Tara Schuster.
I bought this book because of the name, I’m not gonna lie. That’s marketing that speaks directly to me. I didn’t know who Tara was, I didn’t read the blurb, I just bought it with my Audible credits and started listening. At a time when I was coming out of years of hard slog in the Entertainment Industry, my Burnout having struck only a few years later than Tara’s own had, it was a perfect introduction to the power of radical self-love and acceptance that I needed to get to grips with in order to truly come out of my Burnout and my Supernova Moment, shining brightly again.
This book is hilarious, heart-felt and hits all the right notes. It’s so ridiculously relatable, especially when Tara is so incredibly scathing of the practices she’s introduced to that she ends up loving in the end. The message is simple, LOVE YOURSELF, be GOOD you yourself, and BUY YOURSELF THE FUCKING LILIES if you want them. You are worthy of lovely things.
Burnout: Solve Your Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski.
This book was recommended to me, frankly, because it’s called ‘Burnout’. I’m a Burnout Coach, Burnout is what I do, so therefore I must read every book about Burnout! So I read it, and it wasn’t at all what I expected. Personally I think the title’s a bit misleading - the subtitle ‘Solve Your Stress Cycle’ or ‘The Secret to Solving The Stress Cycle’ as I’ve seen it listed elsewhere, is much more accurate. It IS about the Stress Cycle. The science of stress, the impact of the stress cycle on us as human beings, our evolution and the unrelenting rise of a patriarchy that stresses us out even more.
Chronic stress causes Burnout, and so yes, I guess, this is a book about the causes of Burnout. But don’t buy it thinking you’re going to get a book that tells you how to beat your Burnout, because that’s not what this is. HOWEVER, it IS a fascinating read! I read it after my Burnout, well into my recovery (about 18 months in) and looking back on the circumstances that caused my Burnout, and the impact of such societal, structural and systemic factors on my life within those circumstances, it’s fascinating. It just didn’t tick my expectations of a book about Burnout, but I digress. Depending on where you are in the Burnout Cycle, it’s an interesting read and it’s been useful to me to understand Stress better since then!
Please Yourself, by Emma Reed Turrell.
I turned into more of a People Pleaser the closer I got to my Burnout. Since being on my Burnout Recovery journey, I’ve learned to recognise the habits I used to have that led my astray in this area. But I’ve found that as a coach, I’ve encountered lots of different incarnations of People Pleasers, and this book has been incredibly helpful in identifying not just my own People Pleasing tendencies, but those of my clients too.
For me, People Pleasing manifested as an unhealthy fixation on obtaining and maintaining approval from those I deemed ‘successful’, and from those I idolised and wanted to be like. But at it’s root, I know now how much this came from wanting to be accepted, wanting to be LIKED, wanting to be anything other than the awkward oddball I always knew myself to be on the inside. In the end, People Pleasing turned against me because the person I should have been focussing on pleasing was myself!
If you are a People Pleaser, and if that People Pleasing is contributing to your feelings of stress, overwhelm, and ultimately to your Burnout, this is a brilliant read. Again, the Audiobook is a great resource to help with focus issues.
Cheat, Play, Live, by Lisa Edwards.
This is not a Burnout book. But! It’s a brilliant book, about freedom and fearlessness, and a personal one for me.
Back before I burned out, one of the IRL women I admired was Lisa Edwards. I met her through publishing events (back then I was trying to be an author along with everything else, and networking like a demon) and was immediately drawn to her; with her impressive CV and her penchant for solo travel, great shoes, copious amounts of wine and rainbow birthday cakes. She was fabulous, forty-something and child-free, and everyone knew she was a badass - exactly the kind of woman I thought I wanted to be! I read her blog and followed her journey with interest, especially when it began to take turns I hadn’t expected. I watched as she travelled to India, stopped drinking, stopped dye-ing her hair… and started looking relaxed and happy. When I burned out, Yoga was one of the practices that truly helped me heal. I reached out to Lisa because I wanted to do what she’d done - I wanted to have that magical, life-changing experience, go to India and reset my life! And I had plenty of air miles at my disposal to do it. And then, COVID came along, and grounded all of us for the time being. I signed up for Online Yoga Teacher Training with the same school Lisa had recommended in Agonda, in Goa, and promised myself that I’d go there to top up my training with the ‘real deal’ experience when I could.
For now, travel is still a pipe dream, so I continue to make do with my online ashram - and this amazing book.
Also…
Untamed, by Glennon Doyle.
Do I even need to explain this one? I’m pretty sure it’s STILL on the New York Times Bestseller list.
I actually don’t have a physical copy, which is why it’s missing from my social media content, and the Perfectionist in me is devastated about that. I have so many feelings about this book, too many to share at the bottom of an already long post, and I know I’ll find the words to get into it properly at some point. The further I get into my Burnout Recovery journey, the more I’m learning the importance of Identity, of connecting with who I am on a deeper level than I’ve ever bothered to before. Reading Glennon’s story set something free inside me that still hasn’t quite made it's way to the surface yet, but it’s in there, doing the work.
So for now I’ll just say, if you haven’t read Untamed yet, please do. Give yourself that wonderful gift of getting a glimpse of true freedom. I highly recommend the audio book and once you’ve finished that, I recommend Glennon’s (and her sister Amanda’s) new podcast; We Can Do Hard Things.
I am always reading books.
Well, most of the time I’m listening to audiobooks, but when you’re burned out, that’s the same thing. Lisa’s book was the first physical book that I’ve devoured this side of my Burnout (and I read it in a day!) but whatever the format, whatever the platform, I’m loving this adventure of learning through books.
I used to read a lot, and then I stopped. I used to read books on my commute, and then I started reading emails instead. I used to read books on the weekend, and then I started crashing on the couch drinking gin and falling asleep to Netflix instead.
I have a shelf in my studio, that is slowly filling up with books. Everything on this list, and some others that I’m still making my way through. My Yin Yoga teacher, Norman Blair’s book; Brightening Our Inner Skies is there. So is Peter Deadman’s Live Well, Live Long. My Generalised Anxiety Disorder CBT Workbook, still being worked through. My never ending exploration of Yoga and Functional Anatomy means I have a tonne of those, that I try to read a page or two of when I can, until it starts to hurt my poor burned out brain.
If you have read a book, whether it’s a Burnout book, or something else, that has contributed to your journey and that you think has a valuable lesson to share, please do let me know! I am always looking for new additions to the shelf to help me, and to help me help others.
Happy reading!
Mx
